Two items of note occurred to me the other day while I was eating lunch:
1. I can’t write poetry to save my life.
2. I still haven’t heard Arcade Fire’s Neon Bible (2007) in its entirety.
Here’s an idea: why not combine the two somehow? Before I go any further, I should preface by stating that Montreal’s Arcade Fire has been my musical whipping boy for quite some time now; in fact, few activities give me more pleasure than taking any opportunity to publicly lambast their fabricated grandiosity, shockingly amateurish musicianship, and emotional transparency. Yet recently I’ve felt a slight twinge of guilt whenever I begin to rip into my usual venomous diatribes, ever since the band released Neon Bible two months ago. Was it possible that they had changed? Shouldn’t I be fair to the group by at least giving them another chance with this new full-length? I borrowed a copy of the record and decided to eschew the usual review-by-numbers for a track-by-track first impression analysis using that most timeless of Japanese poetic devices, the haiku. In the end, I should have realized that tragedy would be the only outcome of my latest confrontation: I would get to flagellate the band yet again, but at the cost of the world being subjected to my grotesque poetic stylings. I suppose we’re even… for now.
“Black Mirror”
These sound effects blow
Goth was so like, yesterday
Shitty opener.
“Keep the Car Running”
Orchestra again?
Put down the mandolin now
I’m bored already.
“Neon Bible”
Grade school poetry
With lame vocal melody
Lighten up wankers.
“Intervention”
You must be joking
A goddamn pipe organ now?
Pass me the barfbag.
“Black Wave/Black Vibrations”
That chord doesn’t work
Someone boost the high EQ
Ah, the hell with it.
“Ocean of Noise”
Tolerable and
I’ll admit a nice bass tone
‘Win’ is a dumb name.
“Ocean of Noise” – Arcade Fire 4:53 (Neon Bible, Merge 2007)
“The Well and the Lighthouse”
Eighth-note picking? Yawn.
I’d love some syncopation
Someone shut her up.
“(Antichrist Television Blues)”
Biting Bruce Springsteen
What derivative douchebags
Crap title to boot.
“Windowstill”
I can see right through
This band’s bullshit psychosis
Get a grip, wankers.
“No Cars Go”
Stop it with the “Hey!”s
Nothing original here
Manufactured angst.
”No Cars Go” – Arcade Fire 5:43 (Neon Bible, Merge 2007)
“My Body Is a Cage”
I hate this guy’s voice
Again with the church organ
Please be over soon.
12 Comments so far
Leave a comment
Christ, this is the best thing I’ve ever seen. I love how ocean of noise is the only song that you and I tolerate on the album. It makes me feel right somehow. It’s the only sound they don’t try to be completely pretentious douchebags trying to get the most “emotional impact” possible. This band is like The Rolling Stones if the Rolling Stones tried to make “Start Me Up” over and over again.
Comment by Jeff 05.05.07 @That was a dope post
Floodwatch is the greatest blog
Keep up the good work
Arcade Fire: A Neon Bible Study
By David Buckna
http://www.assistnews.net/Stories/2007/s07030103.htm
Flood,
I have no idea who this band is or what the music is like, but this is one of the most entertaining reviews I’ve read recently. Haiku review - you could be onto something here. If you’re feeling flashy, go for it in iambic pentameter: Shakespeare of the blogosphere!
Take it easy
Dan
Comment by Dan Love 05.05.07 @Classic.
I agree with you on the most part. I feel Neon Bible offered nothing new. I do love No Cars Go. And Intervention is awesome live. The studio version is asking for more.
The rest I can do with out.
Comment by Laundro 05.06.07 @Ha Ha. You never sugar coat your opinions. Word.
Arcade Fire, eh? Hmm… It’s always interesting to see how people who continuously listen to all types of music from all time periods and genres respond to hyped contemporary releases. I’m with you; I find it hard to get excited about ‘Funeral’ or ‘Neon Bible’; the material just doesn’t stand up along side history’s great albums. I mean, the internet has made so much great music available (from any time period and from any genre); and, with so much available, does Arcade Fire stand out? In my opinion - not really. But, is it fair to compare a new band’s music to the highlights of all music recorded prior to the band? I guess everyone has to decide for him/herself on that one.
I do applaud Arcade Fire for their obvious love and commitment to playing music and entertaining. They seem to take the craft seriously (maybe too seriously to some) and treat their fans well. And, I credit them with getting some people excited about live music; that’s good.
However, I do blame the band (and Canada) for the recent trend of bands with 7 or more members (without horn sections). C’mon people: trade in some of those band mates for bigger amps. To anyone who disagrees with my last statement, watch The Who perform ‘A Quick One (While He’s Away)’ on the ill-fated Rolling Stones’ TV experiment: Rolling Stones Rock & Roll Circus (probably on Youtube). 3 people, 1 wall of sound.
Comment by b 05.07.07 @I’m not afraid to say that I don’t get their music. Don’t get me wrong, I love me some ethereal, obtuse shit that sends regular folk running for the hills in fright, but the Arcade Fire just don’t work for me. Not down with the program, just yet.
That and their percussionist dude pisses me off.
Comment by JT 05.07.07 @Hilarious! I have gone back and forth on my impression of Neon Bible. I have to admit I have had times where I really enjoyed Funeral, but I still find this post a great read. I get really tired of how a new album comes out and Rollin’ Stone, Spin, and a whole bunch of other mags talk it up like nothing else, and in two months it fades into obscurity. I will say that at the very least Neon Bible is self-indulgent, and the lyrics are overly dramatic.
Comment by SomerVile 05.08.07 @your initial gut feeling is soo right on. i couldn’t even get thru 30 seconds on ocean of noise… keep up the good work Flood!
phil
Comment by burger flippin' phil 05.12.07 @Leave a comment
Line and paragraph breaks automatic, e-mail address never displayed, HTML allowed:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>
I just saw another person’s post where they had a selection of goth-eighties music, and I have to say there is a similarity here. If you are looking for a new DM or so, it is perfect.
Comment by Gabrielle 05.05.07 @